If you’ve ever asked that question, you’re in the right place!

Explore what a positive, healthy, ethical sexuality might look like for you as a Queer person of faith!

Hi! I’m Jon Carl Lewis, your host at Sex & the Gay Christian. I’m a gay, Christian man who has been with the same wonderful husband for over 26 years. I’m a certified spiritual director, and I’m writing a book on sexual decision-making and sexual ethics for Queer Christians seeking to live an integrated sexual and spiritual life.

For more information about this project or to give your feedback, please email me at info@sexgaychristian.com.

Sex & the Gay Christian is an educational and community-building resource for Queer Christians seeking to make healthy sexual and relational decisions and live a life of sexual integrity with respect to their Christian values so they can live lives of abundance and joy in Christ—sex included!

An explosion of resources has emerged to help LGBTQIA+ people reconcile their sexual and gender identities with their identities in Christ. But sexuality is more than an identity. After you’ve come to terms with your spiritual and sexual identity, you may be left with the question—as I was: “What do I do with my body and all its natural impulses?”

And, more to the point, “As a faithful, non-heterosexual Christian, What do I do about SEX?”

Sometimes it seems like the only two choices for actual, sexual expression offered by American culture for Queer folks are a Queer version of purity culture or a crass, sexual consumerism. However, since God has created us as richly diverse individuals, I believe that the secret to living into a healthy, ethical, positive sexuality involves taking into account your own inclinations and desires viewed in the light of your spiritual convictions.

Here’s what Sex & the Gay Christian has to offer:

Thoughts & Reflections

Occasionally, I post thoughts and reflections on the intersections and overlaps between sexuality and spirituality. Although they are my thoughts, I offer them as the beginning of a larger discussion on sexual decision-making, sexual ethics, and the integration of sex and spirit in the real world.

The Book

Sex & the Gay Christian was conceived as a book on sexual ethics for Queer, Christian men. Since then, the project has expanded to embrace the rich diversity and possibilities of the entire Queer, Christian experience. Click on the button below to find out more about the book project and how you can get involved!

Spiritual Guidance

As a spiritual director I am trained to explore with you how Spirit is moving in all areas of your life. As a gay man, I provide an informed, non-judgmental atmosphere for your explorations of all things pertaining to your spiritual life—including the sexual and the relational. Let’s schedule a free discovery session to see if we’re a good fit.

Resources & Recommendations

I’m revising our list of resources and recommendations for Queer people of faith seeking to live lives of integrity. In addition to pointing out good books to read, other websites to follow, and Queer spiritual heroes, I plan to include a glossary of terms relevant to our discussions of sexuality and spirituality.

Thanks for stopping by!

I appreciate your interest! If you’d like to stay involved with—or, at least, stay informed about—Sex & the Gay Christian, I’d love to have you join the community. Here are several ways you can participate:

Join a Sex & Spirit Group
Get on the list for Sex & Spirit facilitated discussion groups.

Share Your Questions & Concerns
I may not know the answer to your question, but through dialogue and prayer we can come closer to the right answer for you.

Share Your Story
I’d love to hear your story.

Pray for Me!
Above all, I need your prayers to continue this work. Let me know you’re praying for me, and I’ll pray for you!

Wishing you an abundant life in Christ—sex included!

This page, this website, and all its contents copyright © Jon Carl Lewis 2019-2023 (unless otherwise noted). All rights reserved.